Senator Ted Cruz (R-TX) is video of the correct way to use weighted sex balls on a womans vaginamany things: elected official, liker of Twitter porn, awkward hugger, Simpsonshater, memeable face haver, possible native Canadian, potential son of JFK assassination conspirator, and maybe, just maybe, the Zodiac killer.
But here's one thing he may not be: human.
Or at least he couldn't bring himself to give a straight answer when confronted with a request to prove he is a human.
This conundrum comes thanks to a potential voter, who cornered Cruz at a campaign event in Austin on Wednesday. (Cruz is locked in a tough re-election bid for the upcoming midterms.)
As reported by The Cut, the voter, Tammy Talpas was talking to Cruz about health care, a topic that Cruz has faced backlash on as a big proponent of repealing the Affordable Care Act. Talpas recounted how she has pre-existing conditions and if she were to be placed in a high-risk pool under new health care legislation -- as Cruz has previously pushed for -- she'd go bankrupt.
And that's when she hit him with the question, "Will you pledge to submit to a DNA test, to prove that you’re human?"
Cruz responded by offering a variety of platitudes, including, "Well, Ma’am, thank you for that," and "if you want to engage in insults... I’m not going to reciprocate."
Now, this is typical Cruz, refusing to engage in things he deems unworthy in an attempt to squash controversy. If I don't engage with it, he seems to be saying, it will all just go away.
But Ted Cruz is hated by... well, pretty much everyone. Seriously. During that 2016 campaign, former GOP House Majority Leader John Boehner called Cruz "Lucifer in the flesh." And Boehner is hardly the only one. It gets even worse when Cruz tries to get in on the joke; he's all smarm and no charm.
It's clear Talpas wasn't really questioning whether or not Cruz was a human, especially given the context. Yet Cruz's treatment of the question played right into type.
The conspiracy memes about him don't keep circulating because people believe them; they go around because this sort of smug behavior by Cruz alienates voters. The more he acts like an ass, the more people will glom on to him as a punching bag.
So we can expect the jokes about his lack of human DNA to go around for a day or so. Maybe Cruz will tweet a joke about it, but he still won't answer the question -- one that strikes a chord with a lot of voters who will decide his fate.
Is Cruz human? Probably. Does he have a soul? Definitely not.
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